Right Fit!

Right Fit!

The man of too many friends [chosen indiscriminately] will be broken in pieces and come to ruin, But there is a [true, loving] friend who [is reliable and] sticks closer than a brother. PROVERBS 18:24 AMP

What is the right balance between too many friends and the right friends? How do you know when a relationship is not needed or is becoming toxic? It appears that the writer of today's extract is advocating caution in the choice of friendships and relationships, and considering how Solomon's life went, we will do well to heed his advice and appy them sensibly to our lives.

First, before you go into a relationship, do you ask God for guidance? It may sound funny, but when you look at the stories of men who moved the world, they didn't have the luxury of many friends, but they knew the One who mattered, and He did the rest. If my life will make impact, I have examples to pattern my life after. Abraham had to leave his father's house for him to walk into God's perfect plan. Sometimes, you may not have to leave the familiar, but you must know the limits of the familiar and allow God to work in and through you that which is His perfect will.

Secondly, when you are in a relationship or friendship, do you ask God continually to guide your actions, reactions and motives? Having the right kind of friends isn't as key as you being the right kind of person. Most times, we attract the exact kind of person that we are. If I pretend to love another, it is likely that I will meet someone else who is also a good pretender. If I am sincere, and I commit my ways to God, He will send helpers of destiny my way to help me to the place of fulfilment.

Thirdly, the end of all ungodly friendships is always ruin. If it does not happen in the immediate, it will happen eventually. Ask Solomon: what was the end of all his alliances? God gave him wisdom and riches beyond measure, but rather than keep God at the heart of his focus, he thought he could maintain the peace by marrying from nations God has specifically forbade Israel to marry from. At the end of his days, not much could be said of him, apart from his wealth and marriages.

Lastly, I need to ask myself: "Who am I". Am I someone to be trusted or do I need to first deal with my heart? When God has worked on me, I become an extension of his hand, eye, mouth, ear and heart. When I see as God sees, lives around me are blessed. It has nothing to do with the natural connection of blood between brothers and sisters of the same natural birth, but brothers and sisters connected by the blood of the eternal covenant, the blood that sanctifies, purifies and makes whole. It is beyond mere friendship, but it is about brotherhood: shared grace, shared hope and shared love, with eternal life as the final piece. Which is my focus? Where do I stand? His time of favour is here.